Beautiful and Ordinary

Castles in the Sky #42

If I were ever to suffer some enormous upheaval where my life changed and I was pining for what came before, Saturday would be one of the days I dream about.

Saturday was a beautiful, ordinary day.

Morning

I woke up at 4:00 am to give my crying daughter a bottle, so my wife got up with her a few hours later and I got to sleep in.

As soon as I was up and dressed, I spent fifteen minutes playing fetch with my dog, Bingo. Then my wife, daughter, and I went to hang out at the farmers’ market. We met up with my wife’s childhood best friend, her husband, and their daughter who is two months younger than ours.

My wife bought a hibiscus iced tea for herself and a fresh biscuit for the baby. I had a great conversation with a woman who was selling black garlic with her husband and baby (who had matching Afros). I bought four ounces, and we all laughed about the episode of Bob’s Burgers where Bob’s secret ingredient is black garlic.

I ran into a friend and his wife who I hadn’t met before. They laughed at something my daughter was doing to her biscuit and then reminisced on having toddlers and told us to brace for the teenage years. Before leaving, we bought homemade fettuccine noodles and bolognese sauce from a father-son team. The father had a charmingly thick Italian accent and told me I had to buy smoked ricotta from a different guy at another tent. The father’s English was perfect but accented, but the son still had the polite habit of explaining everything he said. They both seemed very happy to be there. We walked over to the smoked ricotta tent. The guy was out of the cheese but he just said, “well thanks for stopping by,” like he was really glad to see us, and understood, and there was no guilt for not buying something else.

We took our kids to a park nearby where they ran and ran. Another mom told me our daughter seemed precocious for an eighteen-month-old, and everybody at the park with their children was so happy to be there. After an hour of running and scrambling we left. My daughter took a nap at home and my wife laid down, so I drank coffee and read a novel I’m enjoying. 

Afternoon

A couple hours later we went to my niece’s 8th birthday at a trampoline park. I couldn’t stop myself from saying, “if they’d had these when I was a kid, I would have come all the time,” over and over. There were big families of every type and loud, happy kids everywhere. They sold food inside, mostly of the nachos, pizza, and candy variety you could expect at a movie theater or cheap carnival, except it was shockingly good. 

All of my daughter’s cousins and family were happy to see her and very gently took her to the 7 and under trampoline area, even though she can’t jump yet. I got to catch up with my sister-in-law who is starting a business and is excited, and my brother-in-law who is loving his job and his coworkers.

At 4:00 pm, there was an announcement over the loudspeaker and everyone with a certain color wristband had to leave the play area. The small room they had rented for the party filled with little girls ready to eat pizza. Pizza was eaten, cake was passed out, and they sang happy birthday. I’d seen many of the parents walking around looking stressed or messing with their phones looking bored, but for the birthday song, they materialized in the room, smiling and laughing adult versions of their children.

We said goodbye, let everyone fawn over our daughter and kiss her on the cheek one last time for the day, and got her into the car seat just in time for her to pass out.

Evening

After the party, we swung by the house to gather our bathing suits and decided we could, in fact, make it to another birthday party we were invited to. My friend was turning 28. I became friends with him independently of my wife becoming friends with his wife, and all four of us are very close to the woman who introduced me to my wife.

For the party they bought In n Out Burgers and Shipleys donuts, then just hung out by the pool. There were a dozen people,  all late 20’s to mid 30’s. We are the only ones with kids but they are all so sweet to our daughter and she really likes a few of them. 

We swam, ate, sang happy birthday, then played a game called Essence which was fun and hilarious. To play Essence, one person is the Guesser and they close their eyes, then the group picks a secret person to be “it.” The Guesser then tries to guess who’s it by asking questions like, “what kind of vacation would they be?” or “what breakfast food would they be?” It is a perfect game to play among friends because the best rounds require closeness, trust, and a willingness to laugh at yourself. 

We sang happy birthday and my friend blew out a candle on a pile of donuts. I got to know one of the guys there better over the evening and we made plans for him to come lift weights at my house. At 7:30 pm, it was past our daughter’s bedtime so we left. We wanted to get out quickly so we didn’t give everyone time to high-five her and kiss her on the cheek, but she blew kisses to the crowd and everyone said sweet “bye byes” as we walked to the car.

Night

On the way home my wife and I decided to order food from someplace we haven’t had in a long time but where we used to eat when we were dating. So I called it in then put our daughter to bed and my wife picked up the food.

It’s a Middle Eastern restaurant, and we ordered more than we needed so we could save some for the week: a whole Musakhan Chicken (their specialty), and an entire fried chicken. It cost more than it said it would online so I felt sheepish about it, as we’ve been trying to save money, but after one bite, my wife said, “wow, best fried chicken in Houston,” and the tension melted away. I could make up that fifteen dollars somewhere else. 

We cleaned up after ourselves and pet the dogs. They jumped up on the bed and we entertained the idea of letting them sleep on it, as we do most nights before we send them to their crates. I settled in to read that same novel from the afternoon. 

I thought about the space between what happens to me and how I feel about it, and how much of my life I missed by not inhabiting that space, and how now I can be in that space and choose to be grateful, present, and appreciative.  When I miss the past, it’s rarely the big accomplishments as much as it is the small comforts of some cozy place, or the warm touch of someone who’s not around anymore. 

Saturday was an ordinary, beautiful day of small comforts and warm touches. With a little presence and gratitude, I got to enjoy it in real-time and save it for later. I hope that your next ordinary day is just as beautiful.

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