Ol' Jack was in a bad way. He was broke, jobless, his girlfriend was kicking him out. He was desperate.
"Please God!" he prayed, "Please help a man out! Today, let me win the lottery!"
But by the end of the day, Jack had not won.
The next day, he tried again: "I'm your faithful servant! Please let me win the lottery!" But once again, he did not win.
So Jack's pleas got more desperate. "Dear God!" he cried, "Why have you forsaken me? I only humbly ask that I win the lottery!"
And with thunder, the heavens opened up. A ray of light descended and a booming voice rang out, shaking Ol' Jack to his very bones: "Jack!" God said, exasperated, "I can only help those who help themselves. Buy a fucking lottery ticket!"
Ol' Jack was in a bad way. He was broke, jobless, his girlfriend was kicking him out. He was desperate.
"Please God!" he prayed, "Please help a man out! Today, let me win the lottery!"
But by the end of the day, Jack had not won.
The next day, he tried again: "I'm your faithful servant! Please let me win the lottery!" But once again, he did not win.
So Jack's pleas got more desperate. "Dear God!" he cried, "Why have you forsaken me? I only humbly ask that I win the lottery!"
And with thunder, the heavens opened up. A ray of light descended and a booming voice rang out, shaking Ol' Jack to his very bones: "Jack!" God said, exasperated, "I can only help those who help themselves. Buy a fucking lottery ticket!"