Powerful stuff. I’ve felt the mismatched “shape of our lives” for many friends over the years. It’s one of the things I hated most about the Air Force and moving around a lot, distance and business make it hard to stay close with even the best friends. Texts and occasional calls just aren’t the same.
Charlie! This was such a thoughtful piece, the first I’ve read of yours. I relate so strongly to the simple, often unnoticed, but absolutely grief-ridden way in which we sometimes fall out of one another’s lives. It’s so easy to try to place or accept blame, to wonder if things could have been different... but ultimately they aren’t different, and all we can do is choose to move forward in one direction or the other. Related, the shape of my life right now is a toddler and a baby and everything that comes with them. It’s easily the most difficult and most fulfilling season of life I’ve encountered thus far, but I do mourn the loss of past seasons that each came with their own challenges and unique delights.
My favorite line: “we grow around the emptiness, adding new things and changing the shape of our lives, but never losing sight of that acute emptiness.”
Absolutely stunning writing Charlie. Evoked so much in and around my own life’s journey. From being a parent, to seeing those kids leave and go off on their own journey. Those memories, the space we hold in grief...such goodness. Thanks for this. Appreciate you! ✌️
“I was mourning the living.”
Powerful line and interesting essay as a whole.
...top to bottom just a total banger today...appreciated the touching look back and really appreciate the recs...
Powerful stuff. I’ve felt the mismatched “shape of our lives” for many friends over the years. It’s one of the things I hated most about the Air Force and moving around a lot, distance and business make it hard to stay close with even the best friends. Texts and occasional calls just aren’t the same.
🥹
Charlie! This was such a thoughtful piece, the first I’ve read of yours. I relate so strongly to the simple, often unnoticed, but absolutely grief-ridden way in which we sometimes fall out of one another’s lives. It’s so easy to try to place or accept blame, to wonder if things could have been different... but ultimately they aren’t different, and all we can do is choose to move forward in one direction or the other. Related, the shape of my life right now is a toddler and a baby and everything that comes with them. It’s easily the most difficult and most fulfilling season of life I’ve encountered thus far, but I do mourn the loss of past seasons that each came with their own challenges and unique delights.
very thoughtful, thought-provoking and beautifully written, Charlie. It was a great privilege being able to read this.
My favorite line: “we grow around the emptiness, adding new things and changing the shape of our lives, but never losing sight of that acute emptiness.”
Beautiful piece and thanks for the mention Charlie Becker
“Grief is the acute awareness of an empty place in the shape of your life.” You often have such a unique and beautiful way of describing concepts.
Absolutely stunning writing Charlie. Evoked so much in and around my own life’s journey. From being a parent, to seeing those kids leave and go off on their own journey. Those memories, the space we hold in grief...such goodness. Thanks for this. Appreciate you! ✌️
This tripped out my psyche.